My heart was filled with joy as I sat with Drew to hear his testimony and relish in his passion for Christ.
Drew grew up in a home with an alcoholic father. To Drew, his mom “was supermom” and wore“all hats” because of the environment in which they lived in. His parents filed for divorce when Drew was 14 years old. Growing up in that type of home life was extremely tough for Drew because his dad would often come home and start screaming at his mom. This led to more “screaming, fighting, and arguments.” There were some traumatic events that took place, but because Drew blocked them out, they did not resurface till he was an adult. But praise God, he overcame them.
Drew was born at Beth Israel Hospital. he was about 4 years old when his family moved to Union, NJ around the year 1964, 65. He is the middle child of three; he has an older brother by the name of Craig and a younger sister named Beverly, and they are all four years apart.
Drew found school extremely challenging. He had difficulty concentrating on his schoolwork based on what was transpiring at home. This resulted in Drew becoming a very anxious and nervous child. Not to mention, he had this love-hate relationship with his dad because of how his dad mistreated his mom. But yet he also had this image of his dad that he describes as, “…that whole John Wayne image of a pool player, gunslinger, tough guy...& I chased that.” So, to numb all those emotions, Drew started drinking at the age of 14. He harbored major resentment towards his parents that he says, “my childhood was stolen from me from all the insanity and so I fell hard for the booze at 14.” He recalls a time, right before the 8th grade dance…he was consuming vodka and orange juice…swearing, “I found God...That's what it felt like to me at the time…This is what adults do.”
Drew went to Catholic school for eight years and had some good friends. It felt “weird” to Drew whenever he’d go there for dinner because he had never experienced what a loving family setting looked like, let alone what it felt like to gather around the dinner table. “It felt weird [abnormal] to me…a family setting, a ‘loving’ family setting…because I was more addicted to chaos…” So in the summer of 1975, Drew switched friends and started getting “high.” He went from the Catholic school kids…to the “park kids” where they’d hang out on the street corner smoking pot and drinking.
Drew was on the borderline of being kicked out of school for missing SO many days, but his mother saw to it that he graduated from HS…like Drew says, “she was kicking my butt…[demanding]…get out of bed, get out of bed.” He is grateful for that, as he was able to graduate on time in the spring of 1979 despite missing just about 30 days during each year of HS and practically living in detention.
After graduation, Drew went right into the workforce. Looking back, Drew would have to say, along with everybody else, that he was a lost kid, “never a bad kid, but a sad, lost kid…My group of friends, we weren't robbing or mugging people…but we were burnouts; getting high, taking drugs, and just heading down the wrong road.” It is now clear to Drew that it was his way to rebel against the childhood he never had, that he longed for, that because of it, he was, as he says, “unable to do intimacy because it was never received.” Drew recalls a time when his friends would say, “What's the matter with your dad? … and it really hurt me…I’d start crying, and then I started putting on the mask; not to let people get to know me.” Although his grandmother (mother’s mother) had offered to pay for his college, he refused…he was already traveling down that party-life road and could not choose, let alone see, any other path.
Due to the alcohol and drug abuse, Drew was unable to hold down a job. Every couple of months he would lose a job, start another job, then lose that one…it was a vicious cycle…. but he always had a job, always had an income. As Drew mentioned, the drugs and alcohol were a way to numb the pain and not allow his feelings to surface. “It started all so simple…started out with drinking, then marijuana [the gateway drug for me] then cocaine...and before I knew it, I was doing heroin...I wasn't shooting it, I snorted it…plus everything in between [like pills] …I was a garbage head.” Drew segues into talking about his best friend Paul and him. Paul knew more about Drew than anybody. Although Paul was not a drinker, he was a pill taker. They would drive to NY to buy valium and Drew would drink all the way there and back.
But God was working behind the scenes. Drew’s grandmother was a praying woman. She knew the Lord, she read her bible and this adorable, tiny 5’ woman was always saying, “Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Praise Lord.” “This is the planting of seeds!” Drew states.
Drew believes a changing point in his life began in 1985, six years after graduating from H.S. Drew’s sister married a Christian. Looking back, he says with a rejoicing heart, “She got saved and went on fire for the Lord. And then my mother got saved and went on fire for the Lord.” But at that time, Drew and his brother wanted no part of it; they didn’t even want to hear about it. His sister and her husband often invited Drew to join them at bible study, but he never went. If anything, he got so mad, he firmly said, “…if you ask me one more time…I got so mad at them…STOP ASKING ME!”
Then in 1986, Drew was hanging out with one of the “locals” because he had “weed” when his sister said… “We’re going…I looked at Artie and said, I have nothing to lose…I went to bible study with them that night.” And that very night, a man approached Drew and said, “We’re looking for help…a good job,” Drew continues, “…I got a good job…and at a drug company of all things…” We both couldn’t help but laugh... “Oh how God works…He sure has a sense of humor!” Although the drug company did not “make” the drugs on site, it is rather ironic that that is where he worked. And so, he started there in June of ‘86. But outside of work, Drew continued to “get high” for 4 more years.
Every year, within a 2-week notice, Drew was required to have an annual physical, which included fasting. Drew would actually drink a quart of vinegar in order to pass the drug test. Drew mentioned that not now, but back then, [supposedly] vinegar would thin the blood and help flush out substances. And every year, from 1986 to ‘89, Drew passed. But 1990 was another story…He was not given that two-week notice; he was told “…it’s tomorrow.” Drew thought, “they got me. I said they got me. So I drank two quarts of [apple cider] vinegar that time…I threw up the first one…then I drank the second one and it stayed down. And I know now, looking back, only God got me to pass that test. I don't know what happened because I was dirty with cocaine. I was dirty with pot. I was a filthy wreck. But I passed the test…I don't know how…” Yes, you do Drew…like you said…ONLY GOD!
Let’s back up a little bit…. In 1985, around the age of 25, Drew got his first DWI with a six-month license-suspension, to Drew, it was “a slap on the wrist.” He didn’t take it seriously; didn’t even faze him. Then in 1988, he was so drunk he almost burned down his mother’s house and so she kicked him out and he moved to Elizabeth, NJ. In 1989 he received yet another DWI, but this time in NY, where he spent a few days in jail. Drew was told that all he had to do was pay a $1,500.00 fine and [would go away], not “follow him” back to NJ. That was not the case.
“I got a third one [DWI] while waiting for my second one to come to trial. And that was it. I lost my license for 12 years in 1990. And I went to rehab…I went to Sunrise House right here in beautiful Sussex County. And I was no baby no more. I was 29 years old when I went there. And I wanted to run down the hill and leave because I couldn't deal with reality. It was too much. And I heard God's voice say, if you leave now you will die. And it will be slow and painful. And He just spoke to my heart and said…you never finished anything in your life, finish these 28 days and get on with your life. And it was really hard to stay. I was struggling whether to run down the hill and leave or stay. And I decided to stay. And it was amazing. You know, I knew from Catholic school, [although] I really couldn't focus on God and Jesus, it did plant the seed that I always carried throughout my life…I knew I wasn't alone. I just knew…that He was there, that there was a God. And so, I stayed. And almost immediately, like the next day or the day after, God sent me a beautiful message through [the] nature. It was like the trees went from black and white to color. That's what I saw. And He said to me, He spoke to my heart and said, look how beautiful! If you leave, you’d miss all this and the life I have planned for you. I was scared…I didn't know what was ahead. But I stayed. I stayed the 28 days.”
Of course Drew was scared; of course he didn’t know what lay ahead. Do any of us? But Praise God he stayed. And on September 28, 1990, Drew graduated from rehab. During those 28 days, Drew reached out to family and friends; those friends he “got high with.” He asked them to come and visit, to be there for him during his lowest time. Praise God his family was there for him, but those so-called friends? They were nowhere to be found. Drew, I know that was upsetting to you, but I’m sure you know now that that was the hand of God; God was protecting you, protecting His precious child! For those people were not healthy for your recovery success.
Upon graduation, Drew’s brother offered for him to live with them until he “got on his feet again.” That meant so much to Drew because growing up his brother took on that “father role” which he only rebelled against back then. Although grateful, Drew chose to live on his own back in Elizabeth, NJ. He believed, with God, that he’d be ok. And that’s exactly what happened. Every day at noon, he’d go to AA and then take 2 buses to work the second shift at the drug company. A job that he was able to return to…Thank you Jesus. And for 4 years he received a ride home from a lovely couple who also lived in Elizabeth.
Up until this point Drew had harbored resentment towards his parents for emotionally abandoning him during his childhood. But He smiles… “My mother made it all up to me…when I got out of rehab, she came and picked me up for church every Sunday for two years straight. She made sure that I got saved and knew the Lord. And so, for two years straight, she picked me up. It was our special time, you know. It was mom and son time.” And “The Lord really came into my heart. As soon as I got saved, I went on fire for the Lord. I felt the Holy Spirit hit me like a bomb…and I went on fire for the Lord early in my sobriety in…November/December of 1990…I felt the Holy Spirit really come over me…there was a two- or three-day period where I couldn't see Jesus, but I felt Him right next to me. Everywhere I went…I was like oh my…it's real. I knew what was real in my heart. And I just poured out tears and cried.”
But that fire, although it did not go out, did smolder. Over the next couple of years, Drew never went back to drinking or taking drugs, but he shares, “I went into sinful living…I wasn’t truly living for the Lord…. wasn’t regularly attending church.” He’d go for three months straight and then miss nine months…go for two months then miss six months, so on and so forth. And in doing so, he “never jumped in and connected.”
In October of 1994, Drew moved to Suffern, New York, to work at his company’s other location. He was four years clean/sober at this point. It was also a great job.; same company but in packaging. For Drew, “I found a home, I found a home and it was for me.” Although he struggled with the computer end of that position, [due to the damage of past drug and alcohol abuse] God brought a coworker, a friend, into Drew’s life who helped him learn and catch up with technology. “He was like super dad to me. He got me caught up with the computer, he says, I will help you get caught up. And he did. So I didn't lose my job because everything went from pen and paper to computer. You didn't learn- you were phased out. And so he got me up to snuff. So God always, always put somebody in my path. So I transferred up there, I still had a ways to go before I got my license back…eventually I did in 2002. I served my 12 years; I was the bicycle guy.”
I’d like to mention the following:
God sent another “earth angel” to Drew. He was at the NJ location for 8 years before transferring to NY. Of those 8 years, he was sober for the second half of them. One day during those sober years, he came into work sick with flu-like symptoms. He fell asleep on the job and was caught by his boss. He said, “Patricia, I'm sick, I'm sick, I don't feel good.” She told him that they’d have to meet with the union rep; and after doing so, tells Drew, “We can see you're sick. Next time don't come to work sick.” Why an earth angel? For starters, if Drew had gotten a letter in his file, he wouldn’t have been able to transfer to Suffern, NY. And get this, SHE was the one who suggested the transfer, the promotion. She said to him, “What are you doing as a janitor here? Why don't you go up to Suffern and get a skilled position. And at the time, I only had four years clean, I was still finding my little sobriety legs. And I was scared to make such a big move like that.” Later on she followed it up with another “heart to heart,” saying, “Why don't you just challenge yourself?!” And so he did. Drew applied, interviewed, and was offered the position in Suffern. Drew says, “I picked up my whole life and moved. And I was the bicycle guy for eight years [1994-2002]. Eight years, I drove my bike back and forth [3 ½ miles each way] …I rented the downstairs of a house…and [yeah] I went back and forth and froze my butt off in the winter.”
Of course people offered to drive him but according to Drew, “he was busy, he had things to do, go to the PO, run errands…” But he did accept rides on cold nights as he worked the 3:15pm - 11:30pm shift.
Through all this Drew knew, “The Lord never left me even though I wasn't really grounded in a church. Jesus always calls back his people...and I knew right from wrong.”
In 1999 Drew met a woman and no sooner got married in 2001. They moved to Morristown the following year and 3 years later, the marriage ended. Looking back Drew realized he wasn’t ready... “the baggage of my childhood sabotaged me. And when we fought, neither of us could talk and process emotions. She grew up in a family where her father was a periodic alcoholic…and her mother was a valium and pill taker. So she grew up in the same kind of house I did; unable to talk about anything that was really serious and meaningful” [especially when they had disagreements] and so the 4yr marriage ended. We laughed, thank God Drew had his driver’s license again cause let’s face it…that would have been one heck of a commute by bike from Morristown to Suffern, NY.
After the divorce Drew moved to, “beautiful Sussex County…and I love it. I love it up here…people and nature together…I love it.” Drew jokes…. “Living in Union, squirrels were wildlife. So when I started seeing these bears, my mother would tell me ‘Don’t get eaten by a bear…make sure you carry spray...’”
Drew and his mom were great friends. She got to see where he lived in Sussex County before the Lord brought her home to Him in 2016. “From that time where my sister said come to Bible study, where the Lord gave me a career job…and He pulled me out from landscaping, and smoking weed and taking drugs…even though I didn't get clean for four more years, that job ended up being a critical point to getting clean, because they needed to have clean workers…it took four years, but I did get clean. And Jesus was there the whole time...”
Back in 2015, the year before his mom passed away, Drew and his mom took a “road trip” to South Carolina to visit his sister and the new grandbaby. “…it was a great time with my mom. We were best friends anyway. But this was still more time. And I could talk about Jesus with her, because she was the one who got me saved.” While down there, the family visited the Billy Graham Library and for Drew, another [absolute] miracle took place. As he was walking through the building, scriptures started to “illuminate” [speak to] in his heart. He describes them as “neon bright…and I was stunned…and my sister and mother were like, ‘come on, you're holding up the crowd.’ So I didn't know what to say. You know, I just said nothing. I kept it private. But as I was walking through there, all the scriptures were just, to my heart, illuminating.”
Jesus was calling Drew back to Him for a more serious commitment. When Drew returned home from SC, he heard about what it meant to recommit to the Lord. “And I did. I went into my bedroom. And I recommitted and apologized for being a fair-weather Christian, and for being wishy washy, and for two straight days, I felt His blood, Jesus’ blood in my blood, pure, it was His blood, it wasn't my blood, [no more], purifying me of all the guilt and shame of my whole life. He totally healed me of all...And I cried for two straight days, because it hit me like a bomb. And I knew the difference…I felt His love. I felt all of that guilt and shame removed, the shackles were off from everything in my life, with my dad, and my mom. He broke…all the chains…I never felt it like that. And He spoke to me…You have to find the church.” Drew did find a church, a small church, which he felt was a good starting place. But the Lord was calling Him elsewhere. So he asked Jesus to help him find another church.
Oh, how I love how God works…
In 2015, Drew attended a gym owned by a fellow Christian and he had [ready for this] Celebrate Recovery cards on the table. And That was it. Drew went to Christian Faith Fellowship Church with Hank and Patricia Tino leading the group. And every Thursday, Drew went to Celebrate Recovery.
{Patricia, I pray you see this…although you and I have never met, I THANK YOU! Because of you [and Hank] I have had the honor and privilege of meeting the lives that GOD TRANSFORMED THROUGH YOU! You were there for Fran, for Drew and countless others! I pray one day that I am given the honor of meeting you.}
In August of 2016, Drew’s mom passed away. But not before she got to see Drew take a new job. The site company where Drew dedicated 28 years of his life to, closed in 2014. In May of 2016 he began a new job. Drew believes, “the Lord put me there.” And where exactly is ‘there’? His new job was at The Sunrise House. “I ended up getting a job at the same place…I was a behavioral technician in the same zone where I had been 26 years before…full cycle…monitoring the patients…And my room…that I was a patient in, that was one of the rooms I monitored. So it was…full cycle…and I was on fire for the Lord.” Which led to a water baptism in 2017!
You may be asking…whatever happened with his dad? Although Drew’s dad passed away in 1987 at the young age of 63, he was sober for the last 5 of them. To Drew, “He was a normal guy…and I even made amends with him…[so] I did have that closure.”
Though many chains were broken, there was still one shackle Drew remained chained to… “mistrust.” “It’s very hard for me to trust people from growing up in an alcoholic house. But I'm trying and the Lord is bringing me out of my shell to be able to trust...little by little.” In 2018, Drew had what he called, “a meltdown from depression.” He was hurting something terribly for almost 8 months when his sister recommended EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) therapy. And in 2019, he did, and it worked for him. “It really took out some of the remaining ground glass from the emotions of growing up in my household, of not being able to trust anybody…anything I said in my house, you know, was used against us in that drunken environment, but yes, I'm just branching out now.”
From the day Drew returned home from the Billy Graham Library, the Holy Spirit started moving in his heart like never before. Not to mention, thirty-two consecutive years sober. Once he committed, he was committed. How? Drew was 2 years sober when his best friend Paul overdosed, then he saw the damage of what alcohol did to his dad, but most importantly, with the Lord at his side, Drew never stopped going to meetings. He knows firsthand what spiritual warfare is like and that is why he has “redoubled” his efforts. “…I got quiet with the Lord, and I spend time with him, at least an hour+, every day I do my meditations and readings. And I'm in a great place now, grounded, happy, content.” He reads the bible and allows God to speak to his heart, “…He would tell me what it meant in my past, what it means now and what it means in the future. And it never fails. So I have a deep personal relationship [with Him]."
Not despite the 8 months of severe depression, but “because of it,” God used it… “He was my medicine…and the second time I read the same page, it was like…brand new…and He would start explaining to me…started healing me, He would bring back stuff with my dad and say remember that hurt? Remember that night? It's healed! move on now!”
“So through it all, Jesus was always talking to me, I was the one that pushed Him away….it was me because I knew I was living in sin…I didn't want to be corrected…even though I wasn't drinking and drugging…And every once in a while, I'd see…scripture illuminate to me…and he’d let me know…I'm still here, and I'm watching you…you can't get away, you know, you're my child. And I know now, that out of love, He just wants better…a better, faithful relationship.”
“I kind of look at it as, the disciples were just regular fishermen, broken people. And that was me, I had fallen off the wayside with drugs and alcohol, went down the wrong road, was living in sin. And Jesus came and got me. He said, follow me…and I did. And even though I didn't do it perfectly…every time when I was trying to hide my sin, like we can really hide it…I would see the scripture in the bottom of the church basements [at AA], and they would start illuminating. And He would say, I'm watching, always with love!”
How beautiful is it that Jesus doesn't wait until we're perfect before He calls us to follow Him, because truthfully, we're never going to be…and how amazing is it…that we can do the will of God, right here, right now, just as we are…all we have to do is say, YES Lord, I WILL follow you!
Drew now knows the difference between “knowing Jesus” and being a fair-weather Christian. And how the enemy wants to destroy people. “…because as soon as I shut the phone off [to be with the Lord] everything went wild [Battlefield of the Mind] …. And I knew that the devil didn't like what I was doing.” Of course he didn’t, that’s how you know you’re on the right path…God’s path…The ONLY path!
Drew sees life and people through spiritual eyes now. When he sees people getting taken down the wrong road by the enemy, he pleads with them. “It's life or death…it's no joke…I try to help them get on the [right] path or plant that seed, because I know what happened to me…and during those years of drinking and drugs, I know that…Jesus only…saved me looking back at it. But I [also] know everybody has their own journey.”
You are correct Drew…we all have our own journey different from one another. But there is ONE and ONLY ONE common thread through our testimonies and His name is…. JESUS!
God provided for Drew, always has and always will. Every testimony I get the honor of documenting leaves me in awe of how God works through others to help others. God provided a means of transportation when Drew had no license, whether it was his bike, a ride home from work, his mom driving him to church. Scripture says, “Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; Yet your heavenly Father feeds them.” (Matt 6:26)
GOD ALWAYS PROVIDES! And those that are listening and/or reading this…Believe in Him; He WILL provide for you also. Thank you Drew, for bringing a smile to my heart. All I have to say, as you say…TREMENDOUS QUALITY!
You are TREMENDOUS Drew…a tremendous blessing to my life and to those around you. And you are a tremendous blessing to God's Kingdom. And who knows, perhaps the next stop on your journey will be to lead a Celebrate Recovery group…now I’m planting a seed
And I'm going to end with this…Drew is also known as knuckles, Coconut, Cocoa Puff, and my favorite…THE FLIPFLOP MAN! & for those who know him…there is no need for explanation
God bless you all !
If you would like more information on the Sunrise House, visit the link below
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